Monday, August 11, 2008

The Women makes me hate being a woman

The Women. A movie about women, starring women, for women! And it's not called Sex and the City?

A remake of a George Cukor film (how can you not like the name 'Cukor'? "Coo-kore"; it just sounds important), this is like a who's who of womenly who-dom: Meg Ryan (eh), Annette Bening (yay!), Debra Messing (yawn), Candice Bergen (double yay!), Bette Midler (ugh), Cloris Leachman (triple yay?).

And for good measure, there's token castmates Jada Pinkett Smith and Lynn Whitfield, who I think should team up with Sex and the City's Jennifer Hudson and make a live action remake of the film Sistas 'N the City with people like Heather Graham and Denise Richards as token white bitches, just to be sorta fair.

I like patronizing female empowerment films as much as the next card carrying Vagina Monologues member (First Wives Club: yes, Mad Money: fuck no) but this just looks, as my buddy Mr. C might say, "monolithically muddled in mundane mediocrity" (he loves alliteration like me).

I liked the original Cukor film (how can you not like Rosalind Russell?) and even the lesser musical remake The Opposite Sex (June Allyson was such a sweetheart), but I can't see any rational reason as to why anyone, estrogen-enhanced or otherwise, would really want/need this menagerie of misbegotten matrons.

I think my vajayjay just recoiled into itself.

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