Tuesday, January 27, 2009

PETA's Banned Ads make me never want to have sex again

Somehow I can't help but doubt the possibility of softcore veggie porn turning a nation of obese meat eating beasts into vegetarians. Though it is fun to see how one's intent to educate a nation in a fun away about the virtues of vegetarianism can be misconstrued as a scary anti-sex message to kids who might not know better:

"Sex is fun kids, just like a retro 70s stag film, only if you eat meat you face the prospect of soul crushing, psychologically damaging sexual embarrassment. SO DON'T EAT MEAT. Oh, and have lots of sex with phallic vegetables compensating for meat disheveled wang. Yay."

"Your kitty and puppy's life is just as important (if not more so) than that unborn human fetus formed of alcohol and hatesex that is dying to come out and hate you for having them illegitimately. SO TREAT ALL PETS WITH RESPECT. Oh, and keep on having sex. Yay."

"Women are just like cows who have breasts and make milk and deserve just as much love and respect and...eww, no seriously ewww. Animals need to be treated as equal-ewwwwww. ANIMALS ARE BETTER THAN US. And stop having sex. Cause we need to make more room for the animals we're not senselessly eating. Oh, and cause sex is nasty. Ewwww."

0 painful displays of affection:

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